


Life is What You Make of It

by knaps_docx



Category: Free!
Genre: Canon Compliant, Competition, Fluff, M/M, Nanase Haruka's Loft, Romantic Gestures, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Valentine's Day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-14
Updated: 2021-02-14
Packaged: 2021-03-15 15:34:58
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,981
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29438355
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/knaps_docx/pseuds/knaps_docx
Summary: Valentine’s Day: The day Rin forgot how to boyfriend.
Relationships: Matsuoka Rin/Nanase Haruka
Comments: 14
Kudos: 32
Collections: [Destination: 2021] 2nd Gift Exchange: Valentine's!





	Life is What You Make of It

**Author's Note:**

  * For [SHaRKxym](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SHaRKxym/gifts).



> Happy Valentine's Day, May! I hope you like it!!
> 
> Many thanks to Eos for looking this fic over for me! <3

Rin’s knuckles rapped on the door. He wasn’t sure why he suddenly felt nervous, but the uneasiness bubbled inside. For a moment, he wasn’t sure if he was going to be able to swallow his anxiety back down again, which sounded ridiculous the longer he thought about it. Today was Valentine’s Day; it wasn’t like it was the morning of a big race or doing something embarrassing like confessing his love, butt naked. Though  _ that  _ idea was amusing. It was a day to profess his love to Haru, so, basically, almost like any other day.

But it wasn’t like any other day, and maybe that’s why Rin was so jittery.

The flight from Sydney to Tokyo was nine and a half hours, and though Rin tried his best to rest, there was something eating at the back of his mind, nagging him continuously, fighting every urge to sleep. He just couldn’t put his finger on it. Restless and cramped from the tight economy seats, Rin arrived in Tokyo an hour before sunset. Right on time.

It wasn’t as though he was nervous because of rejection or the possibility of interrupting something important, seeing as he’d forewarned Haru of his trip mere hours before the flight took off, but rather the strange circumstances of their very first Valentine’s Day. 

Rin's anxiousness stemmed from his indecisiveness on how to act. Should he jump into Haru's arms and kiss him senseless upon sight or wait until the mood was right? Did Haru even want to see him? Did he want the full Valentine’s Day experience? Would Haru even care? Rin knew, to some degree, that this was supposed to be one of the most romantic holidays; though some wouldn't even call it one. It didn’t make it any less significant because it was their first.

Rin had stopped by a flower shop earlier and bought Haru a bouquet. They were swamped with last-minute orders, and, to no one’s surprise, it wasn’t settling well with Rin’s romantic notions. He wanted their first Valentine’s Day to be something special, and so far, Rin was doing everything everyone else was. It was irksome. Wracking his brain for new ideas during the train ride to Haru’s apartment, Rin continuously found himself caught up in the trappings of it all. Love shouldn’t be bought. Plain and simple.

Worrying the inside of his cheek, Rin kept fidgeting impatiently. Finally, the door to Haru’s apartment swept open, and the warm smile that greeted Rin melted the worry away instantly. Well, almost all of it. He’d missed that smile, missed Haru. After a soft, “Sorry to disturb,” Rin offered the bouquet as he was ushered inside. 

“Welcome home,” came Haru’s surprisingly peevish reply uttered against the soft petals of the roses.

Rin was still fumbling with his shoes in the genkan when his heart threatened to jump out of his chest. By the time he managed to look up, Haru had his back to him, but the telltale reddening of Haru’s ears mirrored the heat on Rin’s cheeks. He wasn't expecting that response. Did Haru want him to say ‘I’m home’ instead? The idea sent him soaring into another dimension. His heart would definitely give out.

Trying to calm himself down, Rin looked around. Everything looked exactly the same as it always had. It was just enough to root him back in the present. As expected, Haru wasn’t big into the grand Hallmark trademark of petals on the floor leading to his bed or the romantic candlelit dinner on the roof underneath the stars, well, light pollution  — though thinking of that now, it would be impossible for Rin to know whether or not Haru planned that. In retrospect, that was a good idea, like a  _ damn good _ idea, if it wasn’t sub-zero outside. Rin had left beautiful, sunny skies to get to this bleak, cold place. He should’ve thought this plan through.

Dropping his bag on the floor next to the counter, Rin took a wide sweep of Haru’s apartment breathing in deeply as he went.

“I have to admit, I’ve always liked your place.”

“It isn’t bad for Tokyo,” Haru reminded him. He was still the same Haru, infuriatingly neutral and blunt. “Do you need anything?”

Rin nodded, raising his hands into a full-body stretch. “I might shower if that’s okay with you?”

Haru didn’t even reply. He really was impossible sometimes. Rin grabbed his toiletries out of his duffle bag and proceeded into the bathroom. For a small apartment, Haru’s bathroom was quite spacious. But then again, Rin was sure Haru had a few specifications as to how large the bathtub had to be and would settle for no less than the perfect size. Laughing the thought away, Rin turned the tap to hot and allowed the room to fill with steam. It’d been too long since he breathed in Japanese air. He would be lying if he said he didn’t miss it.

Haru’s soap smelled of home, but even that comforting feeling wasn’t enough to quell the nervous tension Rin was still subjecting himself to. It bombarded his thoughts, nearly separating him from his current self.  _ What the hell was wrong? _ It wasn’t as if Haru looked dejected when he saw him, though that greeting could’ve been taken as such. Rin knew Haru well enough to know he wasn’t expecting any more than Rin showing up, and that was okay. However, Rin didn’t want their first Valentine’s Day to be  _ only  _ that  — his out of the blue sojourn being Rin’s sole gift to Haru.

He’d taken the time to grab a few things before leaving Australia, something small for Haru to remember him by when he left in a few days. He didn’t put in the effort of wrapping them, something his mother would probably reprimand him for if she found out, but he found a cute pink ribbon to tie around both items and a small sakura charm to decorate it with. It was enough, Rin understood that, but this feeling was eating him alive and it refused to be tamed.

Was it because he didn’t do more, or was it something else entirely?

Attempting to chalk it up to an empty stomach, Rin finished washing the dirty sensation of travel away before stepping out of the shower. He patted himself dry and tied his towel around his waist. When Rin exited the bathroom feeling more refreshed than he had before his flight despite the myriad of unwanted feelings still picking away at his conscience, he caught Haru’s eye. A strange, unusual sensation flooded over him. Cheeks warming into a fully detectable shade of rose as the goosebumps ravaged his skin, Rin turned away abruptly and found something else to occupy his attention.

Haru had never looked at him like  _ that  _ before.

“D-Did you want to go out to eat?” Rin asked, fumbling with his phone charger as he attempted to make small talk. It seemed to be tangled on something deep inside his bag. Probably the clothes he wanted to wear. Why was it suddenly impossible to think about anything but Haru’s look?

“All the restaurants will be booked tonight.” Another neutral response.

Of course they would. Trying to calm himself down, Rin took a deep breath before deflating minutely. Clicking his tongue, Rin realized he should’ve thought of that. He could’ve called a nice place before hopping on the plane. A simple gesture that would’ve gone a long way; wasted potential from the curse of impromptu trips. Then again, everyone else was doing that too. How could he make this weekend special? Still, he found himself asking, “Have you checked everywhere? Not just the places that serve mackerel?”

Haru didn’t even grace him with a reply.

“Okay, okay,” Rin huffed with a smile, standing so he could meet Haru’s gaze fully. He was staring back inquisitively with all traces of the earlier severity still present. It piqued Rin’s curiosity in a slightly fearful way. “What?”

For a beat, neither of them moved, not even daring to breathe. All of the sudden, Haru was pulling off his shirt. Rin’s jaw dropped slightly, fully engrossed on Haru’s actions. When Haru was free of the obstructing garment, he noted, “Normally romancing is your department,” before going after the button on his pants.

“ _ Holy- _ ” Everything was suddenly out of focus, spiraling wildly out of control. Rin could picture himself leaping forward to stop Haru, but he had completely frozen in place. “Haru,  _ wait! _ ” Face aflame, Rin watched Haru drop his pants to the ground. Expecting a full view, Rin stared blankly at Haru’s swimsuit that tightly decorated his hips and thighs. Blinking, Rin inhaled slowly. His heart was pounding. He’d counted on Haru to undress, though they hadn’t talked much about physical boundaries, and Rin didn’t mind it in the least, he just wasn’t expecting things to escalate so quickly.

And then it finally hit him. All it took was for Haru to,  _ astutely _ , remind Rin that they were both expecting something romantic for Valentine’s Day to allow Rin to figure out why that terrible feeling was pestering him since he stepped foot off of Australian soil. His nerves were all a byproduct of his lack of a sentimental plan for his time with Haru. How could he be so dense? Had he completely forgotten how to be romantic?

Either way, Haru’s pragmatic approach was as dispassionate as ever but he was still trying, and that was something Rin had barely attempted up to this point. It left a bitter taste in his overly-competitive mouth. Dropping his head, mostly to conceal the pout that barely extended his lower lip, Rin exhaled. When he reset his gaze on Haru, a smile was threatening the corner of his lips.

There was a familiar sparkle in Haru’s eyes that only added kindling to the fire. Rin would have to thank him later, but, for now, this was a competition and Rin wasn’t about to lose. “You didn’t want to go out to eat, did you?” Rin figured he should get a better idea of what Haru was actually thinking by calling him out before proceeding.

As it turned out, it was the right thing to assume. Haru’s lips curled fractionally. He strolled past Rin and dug out an apron from a kitchen drawer and draped it over his naked torso, tying the string in a knot behind his back.  _ There was that look again. _ “This is how I normally cook,” he said, lighting the burner while keeping eye contact with Rin. The blue flames erupted at once, hissing with the lack of fuel.

It wasn’t the only thing on fire in Haru’s kitchen at the moment.

The  _ audacity _ of that man. But Rin had to admit, it was typical Haru. If a competition was what he wanted, then so be it. Rin could handle it. He may have lost this battle, but the war was just beginning and he wasn’t about to lose.

Rin nodded, biting at his lower lip. He was acknowledging Haru’s gall and absolute lack of chagrin. If he was going to make this work, Rin knew he had to get to Haru’s level. Loosening the towel around his hips, Rin let it fall to the ground in a heap at his feet. Rin raised an eyebrow as a response, waiting to see just how Haru would react.

It was so subtle, Rin nearly missed it. Haru’s expression remained neutral, but his eyes lowered momentarily before he turned away, focusing on the beginning stages of dinner. With his innards a complete mess and his heart beating uncontrollably, Rin bent back over and began digging in his duffle bag for a change of clothes. He didn’t see Haru look back at him while he dressed, but he could feel the weight of Haru’s eyes on him. The warmth spreading across Haru’s cheeks was undeniable.

Riding the high of his rally, Rin began formulating an idea. It wasn’t much, but it was better than nothing. While Haru was busy making dinner, Rin got busy laying out the details, but the longer dinner cooked, the more delicious it smelled. It made Rin’s work difficult as his stomach growled helplessly. Wary of Haru making mackerel, Rin would attempt to sneak a peek every so often but found his view obstructed. He couldn’t, for the life of him, recognize what Haru was making but the familiarity was present. The thought partially scared him, but he knew to trust his instincts. Haru was a great cook; it was part of the reason Rin loved him. Haru was just as skilled in the water as he was out. Rin couldn’t ask for more in a partner.

For nearly an hour, they both worked separately. Rin spent most of his time in Haru’s loft where his guest futon was located. They hadn’t talked about sharing a bed, even though it accidentally happened the first time Rin took Haru to Australia, so Rin decided it was the best place to hide his small surprise from Haru while optimizing his own area.

Just in case.

Shaking his head of the ridiculous thought, Rin climbed down the ladder for the last time just as Haru was placing the steaming food on the table. Their gazes met briefly before Rin saw what Haru had cooked. The smell, the nostalgic feeling - Rin couldn’t believe his eyes. Tearing up at the sight of one of Australia’s famous dishes, Rin stepped closer, not fully believing it.

“Surf and turf?” Rin managed to choke.

Haru nodded minutely. “It’s taken me a while to perfect it, but I have it down now.”

A while? As in, Haru had been  _ practicing _ ?

The tears were flowing now. The lobster looked perfect, red and plump, and the steak appeared delectable. With a side of potatoes and asparagus, Rin wasn’t even sure what to say. What could he say? Haru had completely outdone himself. It was the greatest surprise Rin could’ve asked for. Opening his mouth to say a word of thanks, Rin came face to face with another piercing stare. It was the exact same one that sent goosebumps tumbling across his skin earlier.

Feeling the heat rise up his neck, Rin closed his mouth and watched Haru discard his apron like nothing happened. It was unsettling in the most unfamiliar way. Rin wanted to say something, but what? He didn’t even know why Haru was staring at him so fiercely and so consistently.

Sitting at the table as he mulled over his thoughts, Haru joined Rin seconds later, still shirtless, like nothing was out of the ordinary.

Rin clicked his tongue and picked up his fork. “Is this how you normally eat? Half naked?”

Haru’s eyes fell on Rin again. Fuck, that look was  _ fatal _ .

“You started it.”

“W-What?” Rin stammered. Heat flooded across his face. So Haru had realized it was a competition. Clinging to the sudden flare of rivalry, Rin continued without waiting for Haru to explain himself, “I started it?  _ You  _ were the one who gave me that look first!”

Something in Haru’s eyes shimmered that reminded Rin of the surface of a pool glistening in the afternoon sunlight. Haru’s reply was as fatal as the intensity he held in his gaze. “You came out of the bathroom wearing only a towel. You started this.”

Rin’s jaw dropped further. “ _ You- _ ” but the words caught in his throat as his cheeks burned.

No matter how he thought it through, Haru was right. Rin barged in, nearly unannounced, asked for a shower, and presented himself, basically naked. Then tried to pin the blame on Haru after he reacted forthcomingly to Rin’s brashness. Just what sort of guest was he? First, losing sight of his romanticism, and now this? Rin couldn’t believe it - couldn’t believe himself.

With nothing else to say, Rin cut himself a piece of steak and shoveled it into his mouth. At least it would give him a reasonable excuse not to answer immediately. Or at all. Embarrassment burned like a thousand torturous suns across his entire body. He couldn’t escape Haru’s merciless gaze. Everything about this situation was so intense, he felt goosebumps rolling across his skin despite the heat.

But then the food hit his taste buds and another wave of reverence washed over him. It was superb. Just as if his Australian brothers were taking him to dinner, Haru’s surf and turf was even more delightful despite the origin. Rin couldn’t help but wonder just how much time and energy he’d put into making this surprise for Rin? Even if Rin didn’t fly to Japan for Valentine’s Day, just how long was Haru going to wait to serve it to him?

Tears welled in the corner of Rin’s eyes once again. Goddammit. He hated losing, but this was too perfect.

“It’s delicious,” Rin muttered defeatedly, more to himself than to Haru.

Nevertheless, Haru’s cheeks warmed fractionally as a smile ghosted his lips. He wasn’t bragging or rubbing it in, but Rin could still feel a bit of biting pride in Haru’s expression. It only fueled the ravaged, competitive fire that somehow was still flickering inside Rin.

“How long have you been working on this?”

Haru shrugged, carefully flavoring his lobster with a lemon wedge. “My elderly neighbor comes by every so often and tries each of my dishes. She can smell them all the way downstairs. It’s creepy.”

“E-Each?” Rin was flabbergasted. “There’s more than one?”

Haru nodded. “I wanted you to feel at home here.”

Rin nearly collapsed from the sudden weight of sentiment. “Haru…”

He couldn’t have it. There was something missing and now Rin knew. He was certain this was the reason for the continuous nervousness and anxiety, and there was only one way to fix it. Rocking to his knees, Rin leaned across the table, took Haru’s head gently in his hands, and kissed him without restraint.

They’d only kissed once before, the last time they were together when Rin finally asked Haru out. It was the end of their date and he couldn’t help but feel the romance and passion unbearably pulsing through his system. It needed an out, and that was the only way to expel the pressure.

Rin wasn’t sure how Haru took it last time, and that fear was enough to temper Rin’s desires when he walked through Haru’s door. Rin hadn’t found the courage to kiss Haru earlier, but now, there was nothing hindering him, no limitations. It was just Haru and Rin, and this time, Rin wasn’t about to let his inhibitions hold him back.

When he broke apart, Haru was smiling. “I was wondering if you’d forgotten.”

Feeling the heat increasing sevenfold, Rin sat himself back on his haunches and picked up his knife. “I would never forget,” he huffed. Leave it to Haru to get under his skin and pick at the things that made him the most insecure. Still, all Rin felt from his actions was love. As expected, the apprehension had come and gone. Everything felt right again. 

Well, mostly everything.

“Is that why you were upset with my greeting?” Rin asked. He had to know. It was still bothering him, nagging at the back of his head just like his festering nerves had been.

This time Haru turned away. Bingo. Rin couldn’t help but laugh at Haru’s typical reaction. Sometimes he forgot just how much of a kid they still were. Haru hadn’t changed much since elementary school, and it warmed his heart completely. Love was such a peculiar thing.

“It’s good to be home,” Rin said honestly, grinning genuinely. Now that he had a full taste, literally, of Haru’s surprise Valentine’s Day gift for himself, Rin was excited to show him his own surprise. Taking another bite, he added, “Thank you. Though, my surprise is nothing this grand...”

As expected, Haru replied, “Just you being here is enough of a gift, Rin.”

Pouting, Rin huffed, “Still, it’s traditional to give gifts.”

Standing abruptly, halfway finished with his plate, Haru extended his hand. Rin stared at him for a few moments, unsure of what to say. His excitement was nearly crushing him, but this? This was almost too much. When did Haru become so romantic?

“You’re vibrating,” Haru complained, finding his clothes from earlier. He put them back on despite Rin’s internal desire for him to keep them off. It wasn’t like Haru needed to cover himself up. Rin saw him half naked all the time. It didn’t stop his thoughts from wandering too far then, and just throwing something on wasn’t going to stop them now.

“Fine, you win. Come on,” Rin sighed with a lighthearted chuckle. He took Haru’s hand in his own and guided him toward the loft. Letting go momentarily for Haru to climb up the ladder on his own, Rin followed quickly, giddy with the excitement of surprise. Haru was right, he was vibrating.

Haru paused on the last rung, catching a glimpse of what Rin had been working on for the last hour. Physically shoving Haru over the ledge, Rin climbed up and sat himself in the cluster of pillows and blankets he threw together for an evening of watching movies together. Using every available blanket and pillow Haru had, Rin essentially turned the loft into a nest, lovebird or otherwise.

“I got these for you too,” Rin said, digging underneath a pillow to grab the two gifts he brought back. He handed Haru the ribboned sketchbook and a package of expensive chocolates. “I know I’m not much for sweet things, but these came highly recommended from my friends.”

“And did your friends pick this out too?” Haru teased, waving the sketchbook in Rin’s face before finding a deep interest in the front cover.

“No,” Rin surmised, crawling close to Haru. The outside sleeve was a beautiful skyline of Sydney. Untying the ribbon, Haru found the small sakura charm. He rubbed his thumb over the soft pink petals and smiled warmly. Rin hummed, “I thought it would remind you that I’m not too far away.”

Haru shook his head. “You’re still too far away. Even right now.”

Opening his mouth to fire a comeback, Haru’s soft lips touched Rin’s. Body going rigid from the shock, Rin sucked in a sharp breath of air before finding it in him to relax against Haru’s soft embrace. With his heart in his throat and his stomach filled with fluttering butterflies, Rin allowed himself to take Haru in. The pressure behind his fingertips against Rin’s thigh. His warm breath against Rin’s skin. The pulsing energy around them as the romance fueled the fire. Rin’s world was alive. He had felt something similar in the water when swimming with Haru, but now that he was experiencing that freeing sensation directly from the source, it was relentlessly potent and ravenous.

Backing off to catch his breath, Rin wondered if, for a moment, he might lose sight of the world around him completely and, if he did, what would happen. Would he lose control of his senses totally, living in a world that consisted just of Haru? Would he even mind?

“Thank you.”

Haru’s words brought Rin back to reality. Blinking away the fogginess, he turned toward Haru. “Thank  _ you _ .” Rin couldn’t find more words to express exactly what he was feeling, how grateful he was of Haru welcoming him and the happiness of seeing him again, to be near him, to kiss him. It was all so much, Rin couldn’t fit it into a mere sentence or two. Leaning forward, he kissed Haru again, pushing him gently against the pillows. He could only hope that everything that he couldn’t say would be expressed through his actions and that Haru understood how much Rin loved and appreciated him.

Because right now, there was nowhere else Rin would rather be.


End file.
